Day 8: A Moment...

Things my heart used to

Know. Across my memory.

Nostalgic Disney.

I apologize...again

There's this thing called wifi right...

And it eludes me, ducks me....

You would think I was asking it for child support money.

*shrugging*

I got that bitch tonight!

Hello loves. I missed writing. Very very much.

I've been wrapped up in all of my thoughts and emotions lately...

Not the best place to be if those emotions are negative and unbearable...

I'm gonna tell you what it's like for me to like a guy:

I like him. He likes someone else.

Or is still involved with an ex.

Or not over his ex.

Or feels weird because I dated a mutual friend and it went nowhere. (this doesn't happen often, this is current. the first time).

I'm in one of those Kiss Me Back moments.

I keep begging for this guy to feel the same way as I do (internal begging, I would never say it out loud).

I doubt he even sees.

Or he sees more than he lets on. He's that type of guy.

And all of this wild goose chasing reminds me of a similar relationship we should all be familiar with:

Kermit the Frog and Ms. Piggy.

Now why Ol' Kermit and Ms Piggy?

Because Ms. Piggy was constantly chasing that ungrateful scrawny frog.

She would do anything for him, go anywhere for him...

She was a real ride or die bitch to be blunt.

And how does he repay her?

Flirts with other women in front of her. Blows her off to be with his friends.

And in one of their movies, The Muppets Take Manhattan, he even gave her the biggest insult of all:

They were legally married and he called her a friend!

After all the grief she went through?!

Granted she wasn't the thinnest woman.

Or the GREENEST woman.

She had an over-the-top, giggly, karate-chop personality.

I'll call her vivacious.

And KERMIT was always complainin about something. He was a dull character to me.

I'm just saying we all have had a Kermit in our lives.

And I am not very fond of kissing these frogs to get to my prince.

Excuse me, my KING.

SO! I will write Kermit this letter:

Dear Kermit the Frog, YOU. ARE. AN ASSHOLE! Can't you see how hopelessly devoted Ms. Piggy was to you? Granted she wasn't AS THIN as you or GREEN but she would ride or die for you. She went hard for your heart. And you constantly played her. You deserve to die a slow, torturous, SOBER, rat infested death for the way you treat good women. Or pigs. YOU ASSHOLE! I hope someone in chinatown eats you, you green bastard.

I'm done ranting.

And I promise myself to never settle for a Kermit.

If you kiss me then mean it. And do it often.

BTW: I Don't Care About Your Band by Julie Klausner fueled this.

Blame her for my low tolerance.

Until next time...

P.S. I WOULD have pics up but blogger is disagreeing with me at the moment. So they will have to wait until another time. URGH THIS POST LOOKS SO EMPTY! It's like an itch I can't scratch...

-__-

CAT EARS!

CAT EARS!!!

Some small part of me (deep, deep down in the trenches of my being) thinks that I should not be this damn excited over some damn cat ears.

What am I 7?

Well at heart...

I'm actually only 9.

CAT EARS!!!!

The Classics Pt 1

S.M.H.

When you read this Tony, know that this blog is all your fault.

SO me and my good friend Tony share a mutual friend in a boy named Dante.

And when I first saw Dante, for some reason the first thing I thought of was the smurfs.

Not because he looks like one...

It's because my brain is retarded.

ANYWHO ! Recently, me and Tony were talking on AIM and he tells me to turn to Boomerang.

And what's on?

None other than the famous Smurfs.

Now, many people don't see what is wrong with the old, classic and BETTER cartoons.

Well I have decided that I will enlighten your knowledge-hungry minds.

Smurfology 101

Fact 1: Did you know that there are only 2 girls in the cartoon series? Yes there is 2. It's Smurfette and another girl. A younger girl I might add.

So I'm guessing this is how they repopulated

Now am I the only one who thinks that these girls were kept only for reproducing purposes?

What the hell did they do with the other girls? Drown them at birth?

WHERE'S MAMA SMURF??

2 young women in a male domintated society.

God Bless Them.

Fact 2: Smurfette was perceived to be a whore. Now I am not sure if she was or not, and I won't knock her if she was (even though most of those smurfs were gay in my opinion. On one episode, they were trying to teach the baby smurf to swim. Smurfette had on a sexy swimsuit with a hat full of fruits. One smurf comes up to her and instead of complimenting her on the sexy swimsuit, he proceeds to go and say "Oh smurfette I LOVE THAT HAT" and then eats an apple off of it.)

Think about that.

Fact 2 b: The FAGGOTRY of these smurfs is cemented with the popular spoof song (circa 2004) in which Smurfette and Others Lick Papa Smurf's ass.

........AHEM!

Fact 3: The popular villan of the show. Gargamel. What type of name is that? Honestly. What the FACK was his mother drinking the day she dreamt up that name?

Fact 3b: Gargamel was on crack.

................

Let that marinate.

And even if he isn't specifically on crack, he is on some type of hallucinatory drug.

EVIDENCE: Well it could be the fact that HE'S THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES THESE SMURFS!

Him and his cat, who he also lets smoke crack.

And this is all I can write at the moment.

That Smurfs Gone Wild picture killed me.

But I think I proved my point.

Tom And Jerry is Next.

But one last thing on the smurfs.

Can anyone tell me, What THEE FUCK was up with the berries???