"I wonder if there's even one in existence, enough to keep my attention to go the distance..."-Lloyd Banks
YAY! Return of the song quote posts!
Lol anywhoo...I was hanging with my friend, we'll call him L, and he was complimenting me (for once).
Anyone who knows me, SHOULD know that I'm a sucker for flattery.
He called me a great catch, and after all the blushing and ishh it got me thinking...
(flashback into another ex story)
If I was such a great catch, then why couldn't I catch one of my own?
This is Aaron.
He was my tenth grade boo.
Key word: Boo. Not boyfriend, not other half.
Our relationship was based on my infallible ability to ignore the fact that I was no more than a jump-off to him.
As much as I liked Aaron, he never wanted to be my boyfriend.
He was a great listener. Funny. Engaged in conversations actively.
Even when I was mad at him, he would make me smile. He was sweet.
Dude even had a little bit of style....
Problem with him was that he wanted his cake, your cake and and the cake batter as well.
We were dating. And while I had the impression he was dating other people, I never actually SAW it.
But he made the constant mistake of flirting with other girls in front of me.
And it really bothered me. But I didn't say anything (cause I'm stupid).
Eventually I asked him where we were going with "us" and he tells me he's not ready for a relationship.
So that was the end of that.
Time passes, we lose contact, he adds me on myspace...
Says how we should catch up...
We spent six hours on the phone that night.
He told me how much he wanted to really know me again, how much he wanted to get close to me and not only in an intimate way.
And I was just sitting there with my mouth half open like "Is This Aaron Really Talking?"
Talking about he was good for me, and just what I needed at the moment.
So I get very little sleep. Because all of those old feelings came STRAIGHT back...
I called him for 2 days straight and got no response. I hit him up on aim and he says he doesn't want any type of commitment and that he didn't want his words to be construed in that way...
Womp Womp.
You know what else came back? All that RESENTMENT and ANGER!
Like, why can't I get this dude? Am I not good enough? I think I'm a pretty decent partner.
There will be others but seriously, why couldn't I get one I really wanted?
In this obsession, I do the predictable.
I go onto his myspace.....
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If you haven't realized by now, myspace is the devil.
Not only does it say he's in a relationship, but it says in his about me "Wassup world, this ya boy
Aaron, as you can see I love my wife 10-27-07 I love You Baby...."
{Insert Pictures of them Kissing and 2 Other Pictures of Her on his page HERE}
Doesn't this sound familiar?
{Click HERE for the previous story}
What's up with this say one thing and your myspace says another trend? That shit is NOT cool...
But it really took a hit on my self esteem. Why did he keep slipping through my fingers?
(even though he's just a 'ain't shit mu-fucka' as Jen says).
I don't get it. It baffles me.
And ever since Aaron, I haven't been able to be interested in a relationship with my romantic partners (with one exception).
No one has really caught my eye like him.
And unfortunately, he was just another bad apple.
I feel like Snow White, choking on the poison.
Anyway just had to get it off my chest.
